Drama try-outs.

Sometimes life is very very good...and sometimes its just not. It's been one of those weeks of just not. We all have them, and I guess you can choose to dwell in them, to relish them... or you can recognize they are there and get excited that eventually they will end and very very good is just around the corner.

Today I had the opportunity to talk about this week and the associated drama of this week with my friend and mentor Tim from Focus on the Family. He started to tell me about babies and parents. He said that sometimes babies cry and squirm and move and cry more. And parents will wrap the baby up in a tight blanket and the baby will stop crying and the parent will whisper shhhhh I love you... shhhh my child I love you.

Tim's point was simple. God wants whisper amazing words of love and comfort to us. But, we are bigger then babies, and we squirm more and its harder to wrap us adults up in a blanket... so God waits with anticipation for us to be still so that God can whisper to us shhhh... I love you. Shhhh It's going to be ok... I'm here and I love you. Shhh be still.

Drama try-outs are over in my heart. I choose to snuggle down in complete surrender to the wisdom and love of the Lord. PEACE.

Be healed!

This week I encountered a side of God that I didn't think still existed. At some point in my life I came to the conclusion that the part of God that deals with healing people was no longer applicable to our modern society. I guess I figured that if God gives all people a job to do, maybe that was why God created doctors. It wasn't that I didn't trust God, or even God's ability to heal a person. More, I just thought God gave certain people the gift of healing...and those people became doctors, and God worked through the doctors to accomplish human healing.... that is until Saturday when my little theological bubble burst and my eyes were opened to a radical new side of God!

Jr. High snow retreat, a.k.a "Jr Highers don't sleep and neither do their leaders camp" happened about a week ago. We had a blast, but I got the flu. And a fever that lasted the entire week after we returned home. It was Saturday (a week after "sleep is overrated camp") and I still had a 102 degree fever. I was tired of staying inside, so my friend Brian and I decided to go to church. The pastor, Tim, was talking about John 5 where Jesus asks a man who had been unable to walk if he wanted to be healed. The man says yes and Jesus tells him to pick up his mat and walk. So he does. Then Tim gave the congregation the opportunity to be prayed for... and I figured if God didn't use a doctor to make the man walk, maybe God alone could heal a fever. So I went up and Tim prayed and God made my fever go away. I walked back to my chair absolutely in shock that God decided to remove the fever, but more in shock that God healed. I went home and immediately grabbed my thermometer thinking that I had been one of those "power of positive thinking makes you feel better and masks your illness" type of people. Thermometer read 98.6 on the money! Apparently God did indeed remove my fever. But the story gets better.

Monday comes around and I have the opportunity to take a great but kind of grumpy kid out to coffee. The girl says that she's sick (hence the grumpy exterior)... and I said to her... "Do you want to become well?" I figured if Jesus used those words, the question was fair game. She said "yes" and looked at me quizzically. I said, "Then we should pray because the Bible says that we can pray about being sick and sometimes God gets rid of our sickness." So we prayed... not joking... she went from horse to talking...and from being grumpy to being in awe of God...and she said verbatim, "I didn't think God still did that....but he does." I said, yep he does!" And I laughed inside at the irony and sweetness of the whole thing.

God heals our hearts. God heals our minds. God heals our bodies. God heals our souls. God's healing power is active, and very much alive today. Do you want to be well? Bow down an pray, then stand up and be whole!

Humbled by God's priorities

Today I met a theological giant. I was in downtown Poulsbo sitting on a bench, relishing the sunlight. A man plopped down next to me, placed his BIG bag in his lap and proceeded to loudly exclaim "Its colder then the snow on Rudolf’s antlers." I smiled and looked over at his face. His cheeks were bright pink and it was obvious he'd been outside for some time.

In October I learned to crochet because I wanted to be able to give cold people warm things to wear. I call my mission, hats for the homeless. The mission has caught on with several different people and thus far we have created close to a hundred hats. I always keep a few hats in my car and a few hats in my backpack and when I see someone who looks like they could use a hat...I give them one...no strings attached.

Anyway, I asked the man if he'd like a fresh warm hat to wear and he jumped on the opportunity. He pushed his BIG bag off of his lap and said, "Sometimes you gotta lay your stuff down to focus on what’s important." Then he placed his new hat on his head.

For some reason, his statement stuck in my head all day long. My life is nuts! It’s finals week, I have a Christmas pageant on Sunday, I have kids that need attention, and work is crazy too. I have a lot of stuff in my life. Then again, everybody has stuff. Maybe "stuff" is material possessions, or challenging issues, or a schedule that will not quit. But you gotta lay your stuff down, to be able to focus on what’s really important.

In the Bible Jesus says, "So don't worry. Don't say, 'What will we eat?' Or, 'What will we drink?' Or, 'What will we wear?' People who are ungodly run after all of those things. Your Father who is in heaven knows that you need them. But put God's kingdom first. Do what he wants you to do. Then all of those things will also be given to you" (Matthew 6:31-33).

I had this epiphany. God doesn’t want us to worry because when we worry, we can’t focus our energy on doing what God wants us to do. We gotta lay our stuff down to focus on what’s important. And what’s really important is putting God first in our hearts and in our lives.

So Sprint has an add right now in which a little boy has his tongue frozen to a pole....and someone brings a bucket of water and unfreezes the little guy's tongue. "Free yourself from calling circles" is the tag of the add. Anyway I am reminded of a little story entitled a sweet wonderful girl gets her tongue stuck on a rabbit cage...here's how the story goes:

Once upon a time, two lovely girls lived in a lovely house on a lovely street in Colorado. They had two rabbits who lived in a dog run in the back-yard of the house. One cooooollllld night the two sweet, wonderful girls went out to bring gifts of food and water to the rabbits. One of the girls spots the perfect crest of snow, laying on a cross-beam of the cage, waiting to bring moisture to her dry mouth. She balances ever so carefully on her tip-toes before her tongue reaches the snow. As she licks, suddenly she notices that as she tries to stand square on her feet, alas she is left dangling by her tongue which is frozen to the pole beneath the snow. She screams for help and her sister rushes inside...perhaps to get help, and perhaps because she is scarred by the image of her sister's predicament. At any case the girl, frozen to the cage, desperately shrieks "aye ung e esen ew e ole" (my tongue is frozen to the pole...in frozen tongue language). Then garnishing up all of her strength, she rips her tongue off the rabbit cage. She lived to see the next day...but still wonders if her tongue has fully recovered.

So what does this have to do with life and faith? Absolutely everything. Have you ever been completely stuck? Ever been frozen in place and your focus is narrow and all you can see is the huge problem in front of you and so you panic and react as quick as you can? Been there done that....tongue still feels the pain. Really, had I stood out in the cold for a few more minutes, help would have come and a warm glass of water would have brought sweet release and I would still be able to taste fully today. The Bible says, "Be still and know I am God." Be still....wait upon the Lord.... peace be still. Rescue is coming if you can wait, stay still, and have faith. We are not called to be reactionary people. We are called to be people who stay still, people who wait, people who trust..... people who wait patiently until the living water makes our frozen places restored .

Its been a really tough week this week. I found out that one of my teenagers from my old youth group in Colorado committed suicide. I remember this kid well because she was one of those unforgettable kids. She cracked me up regularly but also had this deep compassion for other people. In our youth program she was a leader kid...one of those that always came, and one of those you looked forward to seeing every time.

They say she was in some trouble and didn't know where to turn. This week, I heard stories of the brokenheartedness of her friends and her family and I know they would have been there for her had she made the choice to turn towards them. Tomorrow is the funeral and many of those who loved this woman will be gathering to share memories and stories and just to be a support to one another in this horrible, awful situation.

It seems that a lot of people wonder where God is right now. When life hurts so much, where did God go. There is a song by Third Day called "When the rain comes". The lyrics say "I can't stop the rain, from falling down on you again. I can't stop the rain but I will hold you till it goes away." I love this song because it makes sense in my head. Rain happens and God doesn't make it go away...but God is with us in the middle of the storm and there is comfort in that. I know there have been times I have been absolutely furious with God and thought God had just left me alone to fend in the dark places. But I didn't understand....Bad things happen and at the same time God is present, holding us and crying with us. God does not make bad things happen, but God also does not keep bad things from happening. God is very real and very present, and very much holding us and weeping with us when life doesn't make sense.

Knee pains

It's Tuesday night and I am elder sitting a 98 yr. old woman named Mabel. She can't see or hear much of anything , and sometimes she gets really confused...but then there are the moments of clarity when she speaks profundities. She is wise, so wise. And her wisdom comes from experience because she's lived history. Things I've never encountered, she's thrived through and come out the other side and uses her life to tell the freaked out, that life is really going to continue on. The other day we got in a discussion about recession and depression. She told me stories about having nothing but being happy, and she told me about rations and war and her father leaving to go fight and I asked her (OK I shouted into her hearing aid), "Mabel, what's the best advice you'd give me (30 year old, single, female) on living in unstable times." She said, "Honey, make your knees tired from praying." And that's some of the best advice I've ever gotten.

Today I saw a picture of Jesus laughing and I started to think. Jesus was not a stoic monk. Jesus was a multi-dimensional, multi-faceted guy. He got mad, like the time when people were selling stuff in the church and it made it so other people could not worship. And he got mad when religious leaders shoved religion down people's throats. Jesus got sad sometimes. Like when his friend died, or when people mistreated others. Jesus laughed sometimes....not explicitly but I'd bet he laughed when Peter put his foot in his mouth AGAIN, or when he turned water into wine and everyone wondered what had been done. Jesus was scared in the garden of Gethsemane and he sweated blood and tears in the agony of fear. Jesus was fully human. He knew what it was to feel like we feel and there is comfort in that. On the days when we stories in the news of people hurting people and we just want to jump through the TV and pummel the victimizers, Jesus knew that feeling. And on the days that we are sad, and it takes every ounce of strength to get out of bed...Jesus knows that. Jesus feels our grief. On the days that we smile from the inside out and every part of us seems to burst with glee...Jesus knows that glee, he's felt it. And on the days when we are terrified and our hearts hurt from beating so fast for so long...Jesus has been there. Emotions are valid, they help us express our humanity....and Jesus after all, was fully human. Fully alive, and fully feeling.